Sabbatical
12 years ago
Friday, February 12, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
what is happening to the children now?
Immediately after the quake the number one question I received was "what did it feel like?". That has now turned into "What do you think about the Americans who tried to take the children across to the Dominican?". Oh the power of the media!
What I think is that they were most likely well-meaning, ignorant people. They may have actually had permission from someone who was not legit and didn't know any better. It does frustrate me because they gave organizations like UNICEF ammunition to put a halt on children being placed with their families... families that have already been matched and established for them. UNICEF has been vocal and I've heard forceful about trying to put a stop to expediting any adoptions at the critical time. They are steady proponents against adoption all over the world.
Do I ALWAYS believe adoption is best? NO. The amount of money the thousands of people around the world spend on adoption could be put into the economies of these troubled nations and completely change the situations these children are in. But then again if everyone gave (just a small amount) we would have the very same effect. They still say 20% of people who can give give 80% of the donations. The world is not perfect.
Most of the orphans we speak of DO HAVE FAMILIES... If you haven't seen it you really can't imagine it. If you haven't lived it you will never truly understand it. That is why the Lord gives us GRACE and why we hold on to our FAITH. I try to explain to people that there are generally 3 options for many of these children that are eligible for adoption...
1. They stay with immediate or extended family will little to no food, water, shelter, schooling, ect. Every situation is different. But the thing that is missing for many is HOPE.
OR
2. They are taken in at an institution such as an orphanage. Depending on the organization they have a much greater chance at 2-3 meals each day and an education.
OR
3. They can be adopted in to a family where they get individual love and care and a chance to thrive with a new sense of belonging and hope.
Study after study shows that a child who feels safe in a home and part of the family excels in each area of their life, more so than those in institutions and even in foster-type care. I would absolutely love for some of the stable families in Haiti to adopt these children, but sadly this is rarely the case. There, of course, is the restavek mentality and even if every one of them decided to take in one orphaned child as their own it still would not be enough. Over half of Haiti's population is under 18. There are tens of thousands of orphans. So that leaves us with a situation, much like my own, where families in other countries attempt to give these children loving homes.
At the end of the day we are all people. Somos humanos. An organization who is too preoccupied with a political agenda without thinking of the people they are "protecting" is not one I can support. I've learned much about big organizations and how things play out and it is hard not to be cynical. But I would rather be cynical than naive. There are many good people working for organizations such as UNICEF and the Red Cross. But it important to know that their 'political-ness' has resulted in deaths of innocent children. And beyond that, bringing some of these children home to a place they are headed to anyway only opens up room for our children still on the streets to be taken in at an orphanage to be cared for. Last I heard the orphanage directors' phones were ringing off the hook with the police stations and hospitals discharging children with no where to go.
Special Field Report: Haiti's Orphans Held Hostage from Douglas Phillips on Vimeo.
What I think is that they were most likely well-meaning, ignorant people. They may have actually had permission from someone who was not legit and didn't know any better. It does frustrate me because they gave organizations like UNICEF ammunition to put a halt on children being placed with their families... families that have already been matched and established for them. UNICEF has been vocal and I've heard forceful about trying to put a stop to expediting any adoptions at the critical time. They are steady proponents against adoption all over the world.
Do I ALWAYS believe adoption is best? NO. The amount of money the thousands of people around the world spend on adoption could be put into the economies of these troubled nations and completely change the situations these children are in. But then again if everyone gave (just a small amount) we would have the very same effect. They still say 20% of people who can give give 80% of the donations. The world is not perfect.
Most of the orphans we speak of DO HAVE FAMILIES... If you haven't seen it you really can't imagine it. If you haven't lived it you will never truly understand it. That is why the Lord gives us GRACE and why we hold on to our FAITH. I try to explain to people that there are generally 3 options for many of these children that are eligible for adoption...
1. They stay with immediate or extended family will little to no food, water, shelter, schooling, ect. Every situation is different. But the thing that is missing for many is HOPE.
OR
2. They are taken in at an institution such as an orphanage. Depending on the organization they have a much greater chance at 2-3 meals each day and an education.
OR
3. They can be adopted in to a family where they get individual love and care and a chance to thrive with a new sense of belonging and hope.
Study after study shows that a child who feels safe in a home and part of the family excels in each area of their life, more so than those in institutions and even in foster-type care. I would absolutely love for some of the stable families in Haiti to adopt these children, but sadly this is rarely the case. There, of course, is the restavek mentality and even if every one of them decided to take in one orphaned child as their own it still would not be enough. Over half of Haiti's population is under 18. There are tens of thousands of orphans. So that leaves us with a situation, much like my own, where families in other countries attempt to give these children loving homes.
At the end of the day we are all people. Somos humanos. An organization who is too preoccupied with a political agenda without thinking of the people they are "protecting" is not one I can support. I've learned much about big organizations and how things play out and it is hard not to be cynical. But I would rather be cynical than naive. There are many good people working for organizations such as UNICEF and the Red Cross. But it important to know that their 'political-ness' has resulted in deaths of innocent children. And beyond that, bringing some of these children home to a place they are headed to anyway only opens up room for our children still on the streets to be taken in at an orphanage to be cared for. Last I heard the orphanage directors' phones were ringing off the hook with the police stations and hospitals discharging children with no where to go.
Special Field Report: Haiti's Orphans Held Hostage from Douglas Phillips on Vimeo.
my heart is broken
Oh how life is precious and how being a parent puts so much into perspective... Every time my baby smiles I think I'm just a lil more relieved. He's safe with me.... But he's always been safe in GOD's hands. I don't worry so much about him (except maybe the fear of spoiling him too much). BTW... first word is "hello" but only when holding a cell phone to his ear LOL
What I do think (worry) about is the unsettled feeling inside me... I can't shake the desire to be back in Haiti. I want to help. I want to educate. I want to cry. I want a few days back where I was at that hospital, or back on my couch after I arrived home watching CNN n following news stories literally 24 hours a day. OK OK maybe I don't want that. But I know I don't want my old life back.
Experiencing a disaster like this one is too big for me. Thank God, He is much bigger. I've thought about how no one should ever see anyone die. Then I think how the bodies were too numerous to count. Then my mind goes back to particular instances...
The older man we went to Red Cross to donate blood for that very morning in Port au Prince. His son found me in the crowd and brought me to hold his hand, pray over his father, and just BE there. None of his other family members knew his father had passed. And there was no way to call them.
The father who cried on my shoulder while we watched his baby being sewn with no anesthesia.
The young girl who latched onto me and cried in pain thru the night saying "kouche" (lay down) and "kenbe mwen" (hold me).
The young boy whose arm was badly broken. His mother paced by our car repeating "I see one with my eyes. I have six, Lord. I see one with my eyes."
The need is so great... The death numbers still climbing. There is little to no infrastructure to take care of these people post operation, no IVs, no oxygen, no antibiotics, no basic aid, only to go back on the street, most without a home to go to. The physical, emotional, and spiritual turmoil of the people fills my thoughts and prayers.
Just days before the tè tremblé (earthquake) I prayed the prayer, "LORD BREAK MY HEART FOR THE THINGS THAT BREAK YOURS" and... my heart is now more broken than it's ever been.
This is a video made in 2009. The footage is from Citè Soleil, where Isaac was born. The dominos make me smile.
What I do think (worry) about is the unsettled feeling inside me... I can't shake the desire to be back in Haiti. I want to help. I want to educate. I want to cry. I want a few days back where I was at that hospital, or back on my couch after I arrived home watching CNN n following news stories literally 24 hours a day. OK OK maybe I don't want that. But I know I don't want my old life back.
Experiencing a disaster like this one is too big for me. Thank God, He is much bigger. I've thought about how no one should ever see anyone die. Then I think how the bodies were too numerous to count. Then my mind goes back to particular instances...
The older man we went to Red Cross to donate blood for that very morning in Port au Prince. His son found me in the crowd and brought me to hold his hand, pray over his father, and just BE there. None of his other family members knew his father had passed. And there was no way to call them.
The father who cried on my shoulder while we watched his baby being sewn with no anesthesia.
The young girl who latched onto me and cried in pain thru the night saying "kouche" (lay down) and "kenbe mwen" (hold me).
The young boy whose arm was badly broken. His mother paced by our car repeating "I see one with my eyes. I have six, Lord. I see one with my eyes."
The need is so great... The death numbers still climbing. There is little to no infrastructure to take care of these people post operation, no IVs, no oxygen, no antibiotics, no basic aid, only to go back on the street, most without a home to go to. The physical, emotional, and spiritual turmoil of the people fills my thoughts and prayers.
Just days before the tè tremblé (earthquake) I prayed the prayer, "LORD BREAK MY HEART FOR THE THINGS THAT BREAK YOURS" and... my heart is now more broken than it's ever been.
This is a video made in 2009. The footage is from Citè Soleil, where Isaac was born. The dominos make me smile.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Definition of a Restavek
I feel like I've explained this concept so much that It'd be great to post about it. My dad put this on his fb status the other day. I love the simple fact sheet.
In his words...
"RESTAVEK--If you do the math according to this article Over 348,000 (1 in 10) children in Haiti, in order to survive, are in the child labor force.
UNICEF estimates that Over 1 in 20 (or over 124,000) children will die. Yet UNICEF Stopped the Humanitarian Parole for the legal adoptions ofchildren out of the country, of whom ...almost all if not all would go to loving families, So if they stay in the country 3 in 20 will die or be forced to work. So is UNICEF--more politically motivated than really caring for the children."
As a woman adopting from Haiti I've had the occasional questions from the Haitian people while I am there. They wonder what my intentions are towards my baby. It may seem foreign to us that they would question the depth of our love for a child we bring into our home. But in a culture where it is relatively common to bring a child into the home to provide work, you can sorta put their inquisitiveness / suspiciousness into perspective.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
baby gettin settled
we've been speaking and to schools and had lots and lots of company. isaac is feeling much better and i have never enjoyed one person more (especially in such a small package)... told my mom tonight she never told me how great it was to be a mom, must not have wanted us to be big headed LOL
Monday, February 1, 2010
from Haiti to the USA... what to expect
Last night i found myself sad that Isaac is so young and will not really remember Haiti. It's not so much that he can't speak kreyol (and i really want him to learn), but i wish he could sing to me... the other adoptive parents of Haiti know what i mean. They sing and dance so much i feel a little sad he can't learn that here. Maybe we'll move back to Haiti ;)
On the other hand, we are so lucky he won't remember much of the earthquake and the tougher things. He isn't experiencing so much of the trauma the other children are. A facebook friend commented that "..after everything you and him have gone through its nice to know from now on he'll have a fighter in his momma always at his back. Enjoy!"
Chris posted the following after so many families were writing about the children being deathly afraid of family pets. Luckily Isaac is so young he has no problem with Maya. ...
"according to Haitian beliefs, cats can change into Loogaroos, loup-garou (pronounced lugaru) – it’s the French word for werewolf – basically. Kids are afraid of them for the reason that some cats are thought to change into people which can steal children. If a cat walks directly at them looking into their eyes, it is thought to be a loogaroo. If it runs away, it is considered to be a stupid cat that is just afraid of people. Dogs pose a different threat. Dogs are not kept in Haiti as pets. Their only purpose is for guarding the home. Dogs are intentionally taught to attack strangers, and children are taught to avoid ALL dogs because they are considered dangerous."
Tonight i listened in on the Haitian Adoption Trauma Webinar. It was educational and some a little repetitive to me. So, I'm sad he won't remember all this and glad at the same time. What i have to do is just makes sure he knows and loves Haiti and where he came from just like so many of us do!
On the other hand, we are so lucky he won't remember much of the earthquake and the tougher things. He isn't experiencing so much of the trauma the other children are. A facebook friend commented that "..after everything you and him have gone through its nice to know from now on he'll have a fighter in his momma always at his back. Enjoy!"
Chris posted the following after so many families were writing about the children being deathly afraid of family pets. Luckily Isaac is so young he has no problem with Maya. ...
"according to Haitian beliefs, cats can change into Loogaroos, loup-garou (pronounced lugaru) – it’s the French word for werewolf – basically. Kids are afraid of them for the reason that some cats are thought to change into people which can steal children. If a cat walks directly at them looking into their eyes, it is thought to be a loogaroo. If it runs away, it is considered to be a stupid cat that is just afraid of people. Dogs pose a different threat. Dogs are not kept in Haiti as pets. Their only purpose is for guarding the home. Dogs are intentionally taught to attack strangers, and children are taught to avoid ALL dogs because they are considered dangerous."
Tonight i listened in on the Haitian Adoption Trauma Webinar. It was educational and some a little repetitive to me. So, I'm sad he won't remember all this and glad at the same time. What i have to do is just makes sure he knows and loves Haiti and where he came from just like so many of us do!
A message from Hal (HIS Home orphanage director) on 1/28
I am so thankful
Right now my emotions are so raw that I just am elated one moment and tearing up the next. I am so grateful for all that you have all done for the kids and my family. God is Good!!! I am so thankful that the kids that have been united with their forever families got out of here before France and Unicef started their posturing. I wasn't very nice to a Unicef team the other day when they visited and refused to talk with them yesterday when they returned to tell me that I could not move any of the children without their permission. We have secured the new big house and will begin moving and preparations next week. Thank you for your prayers in that matter. Chris and the kids got in to Lima late last night/early this morning. Thank you for your prayers in that matter. We still have about 12 children that were in the very beginning stages of adoptions that we need to get out of here. Please be in prayer for these families that want to be united with their children. They are currently going through all of the emotions that you have all been through for the past 2 1/2 weeks. Their journey is not over and they desperately need our prayers. Thank you for your continued prayers for me. I slept in my bed (not very well) last night and determined that I am ready to go when God decides He wants me. Keep this process bathed in prayer until it is over for everybody. Blessings on all of you my dear CHRISTian brothers and sisters!!! Give all of my beautiful children hugs and kisses from Pastor and never forget that God truly did move mountains to get your children home (Natalie). :-) Love, Hal
Right now my emotions are so raw that I just am elated one moment and tearing up the next. I am so grateful for all that you have all done for the kids and my family. God is Good!!! I am so thankful that the kids that have been united with their forever families got out of here before France and Unicef started their posturing. I wasn't very nice to a Unicef team the other day when they visited and refused to talk with them yesterday when they returned to tell me that I could not move any of the children without their permission. We have secured the new big house and will begin moving and preparations next week. Thank you for your prayers in that matter. Chris and the kids got in to Lima late last night/early this morning. Thank you for your prayers in that matter. We still have about 12 children that were in the very beginning stages of adoptions that we need to get out of here. Please be in prayer for these families that want to be united with their children. They are currently going through all of the emotions that you have all been through for the past 2 1/2 weeks. Their journey is not over and they desperately need our prayers. Thank you for your continued prayers for me. I slept in my bed (not very well) last night and determined that I am ready to go when God decides He wants me. Keep this process bathed in prayer until it is over for everybody. Blessings on all of you my dear CHRISTian brothers and sisters!!! Give all of my beautiful children hugs and kisses from Pastor and never forget that God truly did move mountains to get your children home (Natalie). :-) Love, Hal
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
